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October 25, 2006 | South Carolina Headlines


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Calling a Bordello
Jonathan Pait
October 29, 2003

First, about the blonde . . .

Okay, I don't normally have jokes up here, but I finally came across a blonde joke that I have not heard. Enjoy:

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, "Please come over here and Help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can't figure out how to get it started."

Her boyfriend asks, "What is it supposed to be when it's finished?"

The blonde says, "According to the picture on the box, it's a tiger."

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table. He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, "First of all, no matter what we do, we're not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger."

He takes her hand and says, "Second, I want you to relax. Let's have a nice cup of tea, and then....." he sighed, "let's put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box."

Now, about the bordello . . .

This isn't a joke. When looking through the Greenville News this morning, I saw the feature of Craig McNamara, owner and chef of Betty Pearle's Bourbon Street Bordello. It reminded me of a friend of mine. She is a grandmother who lives alone on the edge of one of Greenville's historical districts. Now you may wonder what connection she has with Betty Pearle's.

Turns out that my friend has a phone number very close to that of the restaurant. For years now she has received phone calls at odd hours of the night. "Hello," she says half asleep. "Yeah, is this Betty Pearle's?" comes the typical response.  Now, she did catch wind that this was a restuarant, but being she doesn't get downtown much she didn't even know the full name of the establishment.

She began to suspect that maybe there was something other than cajun gumbo being cooked up at this place. Why would people be calling a restuarant at 3 AM? Could they be selling drugs out of the back door? Was it a night club that stayed open all night long?

Of course, it is nothing of the sort. It is a well established restaurant that cooks up some good cajun food. So, why the phone calls? Could it be the name? Could the "gentlemen" who call in the wee hours of the morning be looking for an actual bordello?

Ironically, my friend received one of the calls last night. Next time she gets a call, she isn't going to say, "I'm sorry, you've got the wrong number." She will say, "What do you want?" Maybe then the mystery will be solved. Are these guys looking for spicey chicken or steamy chicks?

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One of the problems of believing in the inherent evil of man is that it causes one to assume evil intent where there is none. I've noticed this a lot from devoutly religious people.  . . .

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